Time to Write

 I'm fairly good at making time to write, as long as I am writing with others. I am not so good about showing up for myself. I am still juggling projects, trying to clear them from my To Do list so I can make time for things I want to do. I have a history of doing this. I will do (fill-in the blank) once I complete this or that. The truth is, I continue to have things and find things to do. This time I am working with a local historical society. Processing their papers, giving a talk, and acting as their treasurer for the time being. This takes time. I wanted to help out. This is how a lot of my projects or duties begin. I am trying to help someone out and then, I bypass the things I really want to do. Or do I? I think my artful procrastination is a technique of fear. All of the what ifs and feelings of not enough. My goal behind the blog was to make myself accountable to myself. Still haven't quite figured out how to do it.

I meet with groups throughout the week. If I time it just right, I can meet with a group each day of the week sometimes twice a day and write with people from all over the world. I try to make at least 3 sessions a week. Some weeks I make more. This is what keeps me accountable to writing. This helps me have a writing practice. I am ever so grateful for those who host these opportunities. I have met so many interesting people through this practice. It is a simple practice. We sit in silence for 4-5 minutes. We have a couple of prompts which are optional. We write - and give ourselves permission to write whatever comes. Then we break into groups and read what we wrote. No good, no bad, just what it is. No comment. The writing, the reading, the listening is all part of the practice. Sometimes we allow recall - just a recall of a word or phrase that came from the writing. It is my practice for now. 

I dream of having a practice with myself. I started morning pages a couple of months ago and did it for awhile but eventually it faded away. Days when I spend each morning doing something a little differently than the last make it hard to set a routine. I want to be a person who has a routine but continually decide not to. My mornings vary based on my nights. Some nights I don't sleep as well as others which greatly effects my morning. Some mornings I have appointments that start my day, so my spaciousness is rushed to get me where I need to go on time.

Now, I am excited about a novel. I have an idea. I want to set aside time to write, to get it on paper, even if just outlines and vignettes. How can I set up time to write? How can I make it sacred for myself? Patience and practice are key. Both things I struggle with. Perfectionism rears its ugly head if I break my schedule for even a day.